Try Changing Strategies
If we can’t seem to communicate with a loved one – be it a friend, spouse, a family member or our own child, try changing strategies.
(If you a parent, don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you have a ‘lousy’ child or that you are a ‘lousy’ parent.)
If talking harshly, nagging, ordering or being too passive doesn’t work, change to a different strategy.
Keep changing strategies till you find one which produces some positive results!
Einstein defines insanity as “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” 🙂
Encouraging Parents Create a World of Difference!
This is a quick tip for parents out there 🙂
Encouraging parents make a world of difference to their kids. 🙂
If your child keeps failing Maths, for example, encourage him or her by saying, “If you work hard, I know you can get B3 for your Maths”, “I believe in you” and “I’m confident you can score better marks in your next test – you can do it.”
Children or teens who have encouraging parents are less likely to get influenced by negative comments made by friends or even teachers.
If we show them that we have faith in them, they are less likely to get affected by comments such as “You have no aptitude in Maths.” (Trust me, my Secondary 3 Maths teacher once told me that! =P)
Sincerely have faith in your children and you will reap the rewards over time.
Winner’s Mindset vs an Underachiever’s Mindset
Whether we are a ‘winner’ or an ‘underachiever’ depends on our actions and the way we think.
‘Winners’ take responsibility for their actions and learn from their mistakes.
‘Underachievers’ tend to give excuses and blame others for their unhappiness.
It’s not easy to have a winner’s mindset (it’s easier to just blame others and complain).
However, don’t be so hard on ourselves – slowly start taking ownership of our actions (which requires us to swallow our pride at times).
Remember – it takes time to change from an ‘underachieving’ mindset to a ‘winner’s’ mindset. 🙂
1 Technique to Feel Better (almost) Instantly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FU8Nf9WQ7yk
In this video, I'll be sharing 1 technique to feel better (almost) instantly.
Our thoughts influence our feelings.
If we want to feel good, we need empowering thoughts. If we are feeling not-so-great, chances are: we are having self-defeating thoughts. Hope this video helps in some way. 🙂
4 Scientific Methods to Boost Self-Esteem for Work & School Success
https://youtu.be/autyg0XaGEI
In this post, I’ll be sharing 4 scientific ways for us to boost self-esteem. We can use them on ourselves – or teach them to our children.
How is self-esteem linked to work or school?
2 Benefits of Good Self-Esteem
According to research, people with good self-esteem get career success much faster. In fact, their successful achievements are double compared to those with poor self-esteem.
When they get negative feedback from a boss, people with good self-esteem don’t take it personally. They know that they are competent individuals and don’t crumble after negative feedback.
Good self-esteem is also connected to good mental health. People with good self-esteem don’t get stressed easily. They are not bothered by a few negative comments and they don’t sweat the small stuff.
Just a side note: Teens who are easily jealous are likely to suffer from very low self esteem.
4 Scientific Tips to Boost Self-esteem.
Tip 1 is to set high expectations for ourselves. When we set high goals, we will perform at a higher level.
If you expect yourself to reach that goal, you most likely will reach it. It works for many people. So when we finally achieve that high goal, we will feel a boost of confidence.
Tip 2 is to be more optimistic. People with good self-esteem believe that bad events are temporary.
Also, they don’t shoot themselves for failures. They look for other factors which also lead to the failure.
For example, Jane bought a new drawer for her new house and it came with unclear instructions and many parts to fix together. A pessimist will think this way: ‘What a fool I am! I can’t even assemble a small drawer!’
However, Jane being one with good self-esteem, will think: ‘I’m not fixing the drawer properly. I’m going to get my friend to help me with this. The instructions are not clear anyway.’
She does not take the blame 100%, which preserves her confidence.
Tip 3 is to practise public speaking.
If we can stand in front of an audience – even in a small meeting – and make people understand our ideas, we will feel confident. This means we are watching facial expressions and speaking directly to our audience. (Not merely reading from a PowerPoint slide:) )
Making successful presentations has been a self-esteem booster for millions of students.
Tip 4 is to be resilient. This means convincing ourselves that we can conquer embarrassing events and challenges.
Successful people have made more mistakes than the average person. They can bounce back from their mistakes fast. If we crumble after every mistake, it will crush our confidence.
To summarise this post, these are the 4 scientific ways to build our self-esteem:
Set high expectations
Being optimistic
Practise public speaking
Being resilient.
Have a good start to 2018. 🙂