Failure Motivation: How to go from Shameful to Feeling Empowered
I’ll be sharing some mindset shifts you can adopt so you can feel motivated when you have ‘failed .’
You can download the Stay Positive worksheet below to help you get perspective (and feel empowered) when things go belly up.
Let’s get started!
I’ve failed miserably. Now what?
If you are a perfectionist, failing is like death. It’s embarrassing, mortifying and stomach-churningly shameful.
I’m not sure how you define failure.
Perhaps you did not achieve a goal you announced publicly. Maybe you started something and nobody showed up (ouch). Maybe you flopped badly during a presentation in front of your colleagues.
If we don’t make mistakes in life, we don’t learn.
‘Failures’ and mistakes mean we took a risk against our inner critic. Don’t let yourself be defined by your mistakes.
Besides, failures and mistakes are just ‘feedback’ that our strategies are not working.
If you want to feel calmer and less mortified about your mistakes, you can download the Stay Positive worksheet below.
You list down 3 valuable points your ‘failure’ has taught you. It sounds simple, but feels empowering if done right!
But everyone else thinks I’m a failure! How do I handle that?
Maybe you have accepted your mistake and moved on.
But you feel as though other people are still talking about you and your ‘mistake’.
My questions are...
Are people really talking about you? How long are they going to gossip and think about you? (clue: not very long)
Do some of them actually secretly admire your guts?
People are usually kind. They may even be sympathetic towards your ‘failure’.
Your life is your journey. Everybody’s journey is different. Some people can stick to a job for 20 years (good for them).
Some of us like to switch jobs and try new things. Some of us don’t like the 9-5. Some of us like doing volunteer work over working.
Some of us like to go out of our comfort zones and do things other people call ‘risky’ or a ‘waste of time.’
Successful people make more mistakes than the average person. Remember that.
Hence, it is okay to explore new things (and flop along the way).
Why did I fail?
Maybe you were not committed enough. If it makes sense, give yourself 3 years of commitment for any venture or job before calling it quits.
Maybe you were not 100% into the project. Some part of your psyche does not want you to succeed. “Because if I’m a success, I will have a new set of friends and lose my current friends.” So you hold yourself back to keep your relationships. Self sabotage, anyone?
My last words on ‘failure’…
If you want to stop feeling shameful whenever you make mistakes, you can download the Stay Positive worksheet.
It helps you gain perspective and feel more relaxed about your ‘failures’.
The more mistakes we make, the more we will learn.
Meanwhile, have a good week!
Shikah
