Caring what other people think will prevent us from living our desired life or ‘our purpose’.
Caring too much about offending someone, being the topic of gossip, “what other people will say” will hold us back.
It doesn’t benefit us to be scared of other people’s judgement.
It creates frustration. Unhappiness. Totally not worth it.
And prevents you from expressing and living your purpose in life.
If you want to find your purpose, you can key in your email address and I’ll send the ‘My Life Purpose Action Sheet’ to your inbox.
If you learn better through videos, you can choose to watch the video version of this blog entry:
If you are ready, let’s learn 5 real-life practical mindset shifts we can adopt today to not care what other people think!
1. We are not that important!
I hope I did not kill your confidence with that sentence.
What I meant is…
Other people are more worried about their own problems and self-image.
Oh, and they are more worried about how other people see them.
In fact, their dinner plans for today are more important than you or me.
So in reality, we are not occupying other people’s minds much.
That’s what I meant when I wrote ‘We are not that important.’
Which is good news because it makes us feel free to do what we want without worrying too much about what other people think!
2. People will gossip for 5 minutes max
Yes, your friends, ex-colleagues and so on will talk about you if you try something new.
For about 5 minutes, that is.
After that, they will change the topic or talk about another person or the weather.
Some people will continue talking about you for days or weeks. But they will usually stop after some time because
1) it gets boring
2) they’ve gotten used to the ‘new you’.
So yes, the beginning stages of trying something new or ‘putting yourself out there’ will be painful.
You will grow thick skin after that and will not care so much about what other people of your new projects!
3. People are kinder than you think
Our minds are programmed to focus on negativity.
But in reality, people are actually kinder than we think.
Let’s say you have created a self-help video or IG TV video for the first time and feel terrified to upload it and let your friends know. (Been there, done that!!)
You can be fighting the urge to upload it for days or months because you care about what others think of you.
If you choose to upload it after pondering, you will realise that your (genuine) friends + family will usually support you.
Some of them will even secretly admire you for having the guts to put yourself out there.
Many people are petrified of sharing their perspectives and opinions in public.
Your first video or blog entry or passion project will suck. I will promise you that. (Hehe)
But the more you practise creating, the better you get. I promise you that too.
True story:
When I first made a self-help video “How to Be More Decisive”, I fought for my iPhone with my husband for 1 hour because I simply could not click the ‘Post’ button on Facebook.
He pushed me to upload it. But I was terrified of ‘putting myself out there’ for the first time.
When I published it, I received so many supportive comments from people. (I was beyond embarrassed at that time that people I know were watching it.)
The video quality was bad, the video was shaky and I was nervous as heck (although I do think the content was useful. Haha).
I’ve not created many videos since then because I prefer writing.
My point is, don’t worry too much about what others think because most people are nice. And are likely to support your work.
4. Not everyone on earth will like you and your message
This.
There are 7.7 billion people on earth. You can’t make every one of them like you.
Your message or perspective may not resonate with some people.
Some people won’t like how you speak.
Some will not like how you look.
And that is fine.
That’s why there are so many life coaches out there, for example. I may not resonate with Coach A but I may like Coach B.
You will not be everyone’s cup of tea.
I know that I have friends who don’t resonate with my views on self-love and self-worth.
But it’s okay to me because self-love and personal development are not for everyone!
5. How to find your purpose
Your purpose does not fall far from your joy.
’Purpose’ does not always mean saving the world.
Some of us have a purpose like that, whereas some of us have a different purpose.
If you want to find your life’s purpose, I have created an action sheet with 3 questions to help you discover it.
Some of us are destined to be caregivers in our family (such as happy stay-at-home-mums, happy elderly caregivers or people who work joyfully in the caregiving industry).
Whether we have a larger-than-life purpose or a ‘smaller’ one, it does not matter.
Because we all need each other to thrive.
Caring too much about what others think will chain us from living our purpose.
If finding your purpose is something you are working on, answer the 3 questions in the ‘My Life Purpose Action Sheet’ and you will be 1 step closer to finding it!
Have a good week.
Shikah
