How to Stop Procrastinating due to Fear of Failure
I’m sharing 5 tips to stop procrastinating so you can achieve your goals. Fear of failure may be the cause of your procrastination. Overcoming procrastination means we have to be truthful to ourselves and find the reasons WHY we are procrastinating the way we do.
I will be sharing 5 ways to stop procrastinating due to fear of failure.
If we have low self-esteem, chances are we procrastinate due to fear of failure. We associate mistakes with our value as a person.
In the video below, I will share with you how we can do a mindset shift about our perfectionistic thoughts and practical ways to stop procrastinating in our day-to-day lives.
What you will learn from this video:
The 1-hour rule to be productive
Overcoming perfectionistic thoughts + worksheet recommendation
Tackle the easy or difficult tasks first?
The best time to do your work
How not to be fearful of failing
If you are a perfectionist, the Pause Perfectionism cheatsheet + this overcome perfectionism article will be helpful when you are overwhelmed with perfectionistic thoughts and procrastinating.
Featured in this video:
3 Actions to Overcome Perfectionism
14 Days of Self-love. Create a self-loving mindset and live life on your own terms
Meanwhile, have a good week!
Shikah
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How to be Assertive when Communicating and Voice Your Opinions Confidently
I’m sharing 5 habits of assertive communication for introverts with self-worth issues! To help you voice your opinions confidently without fear.
These are 5 habits for assertive communication for introverts with self-esteem issues.
Some of us shy away from communicating ‘assertively’.
If we are not confident enough, we get nervous voicing our opinions.
Then again…what we are we nervous about?
Most likely afraid of losing friendships, getting into arguments and people thinking our viewpoint is stupid.
(Especially when we surround ourselves with domineering personalities who always think they are right and have no qualms putting down other people’s smart opinions. Ugh.)
If you want a shortcut to raising your self-esteem, I have 14 activities you can try out. You can download the list below.
By the way, if you want something actionable and love yoga, you might find this Throat Chakra Yoga helpful in helping you (in a more new-age sense).
So what are the 5 habits of assertive communication?
Habit 1: Know that your opinions are worthy
Your opinions are as valid as anyone else’s.
It does not matter if you do not have a high-ranking position at work or if you are still young.
Your opinions should still be respected.
Besides, if you are around people with classy behaviour, they will usually respect your opinions, even if they don’t agree with it.
(And that’s ok. There are 7.7 billion people on this planet - not everyone is going to agree with us!)
So communicate assertively all you want.
If you are around non-classy people…well, they will scorn your opinions and then make fun of you behind your back. You know who they are. Time to stop hanging out with them.
I should also point out that there is a difference between communicating assertively and being aggressive.
If you are assertive, it means that you hold strongly to your opinions BUT you still respect other people’s different points of view.
And no, we do not put down another person’s opinion or insist that our opinion is ‘the right one’.
Don’t be that girl.
Habit #2: Use words such as ‘we’ and ‘I’
If you have some self-confidence issues, you will feel better using ‘we’ and ‘I’ when you are not happy with something.
For example: “I think we can work on this to make it better”, “Let’s improve on this. We can…” or “The steak is not done the way I ordered it…can I have a replacement please?”
Also add ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when necessary.
And use a question to get someone to do something for you. (“Can you help me to XYZ please? Thanks very much!”)
I have to add that some people are nasty by nature and will step all over you when you are cordial.
That is when you can 1) not reply the person 2) be less cordial (“Thanks for your input. I want this and this to be done. Thank you!”).
I would personally choose not to reply if someone is being nasty to me. Don’t feed the negativity. Your mental health and peace is more important.
Habit #3: Assume positive intent
When we are angry, sometimes we jump immediately to assuming the worst in people.
This is especially true for some of us who have lower self-esteem.
”He purposely ignored my message didn’t he?”
“He is definitely ignoring what I want and doesn’t care about my needs.”
When we are angry and want to voice out our frustration, it’s good to be factual.
For example:
”I don’t like waiting for 30 minutes. It was tiring for me.”
“I was waiting for your reply last night.”
As always, avoid using ‘you’. Use lots of ‘I’ and ‘we’.
(Note that my tactics are for women who are introverted with some self-worth issues.
If you are a passionate woman brimming with confidence, you may be impatient with these tactics)
Also, assume that the other person has no ill intention. (Difficult, I know)
I would say that 90% of the time, people don’t have ill intentions.
They genuinely forgot something. They are truly busy and occupied. They are distracted by other things in their lives.
Habit #4: Embarrassment is not the end of the world
When we voice our opinions, sometimes they are not…right.
Our opinions are still valid and need to be respected. But may be factually wrong at times.
(Like correcting someone’s usage of the word ‘traction’ and then realising that our definition of that word is wrong. True story).
It’s alright to laugh at ourselves. That’s why it’s good to be open to different suggestions when being assertive.
If we are rigid…we will look even more foolish when we make mistakes,yes?
We will make mistakes. That’s a given. But embarrassment is not a big deal - people forget about it faster than we think.
Habit #5: Be comfortable saying ‘No’
Saying ‘no’ is probably very hard for you if you have self-esteem issues. But saying ‘No’ is important to respect our own boundaries.
Remember - our boundaries are as important as other people’s boundaries.
If you are not comfortable doing something for others, you can try saying ‘no’ in these 5 ways:
“Can I complete that tomorrow instead?”
“I can’t help you with that. But you can call this number for information.”
“I need the money right now, so I can’t lend you $5000. Sorry!”
“Let me think about it.” (and hopefully the person forgets about the task)
“Not right now. Maybe next time.”
The above examples are more indirect in nature.
This makes them perfect for some of us who are struggling with self-confidence.
I can’t suggest for you to be direct and say “No, I can’t do that” firmly if you are in the process of building your self-esteem. It’s good to start slow - be indirect at saying ‘no’ first.
And when our confidence builds up, we can be more direct when someone crosses our boundaries.
My last thoughts on assertive communication..
If you want to be more assertive and wish to have a shortcut to raise your self-esteem, you can download a list 14 self-esteem boosting activities below!
Kickstart your journey to be a self-loving woman.
I created 14 Days of Self-Love because many women lack self-worth.
These short but powerful 14 lessons will shift your mindset to be kinder to yourself.
You will create a brand-new self-loving mindset!
The price is really affordable ($37. For lifetime access. And new material added as time passes.)
Give yourself (or someone you care about) the gift of a self-loving mindset.
Meanwhile, have a good week.
Shikah
14 Activities to Build Your Self-esteem and Self-worth
I’ll be sharing 14 activities which will raise your self-esteem and make you feel worthy. For your convenience, you can download and print the list of 14 self-esteem activities for your own use!
A list of 14 self-esteem activities to build your self-worth and feel comfortable in your own skin.
I wish there is a shortcut to building self-esteem and realising our self-worth.
That was why I created this printable,14 Days of Self-Esteem. It will help to create feelings of self-worth for you.
For your easy reference, you can download and print the list of 14 self-esteem activities below:
You can read my article on 7 secrets to build self-esteem if you want more advice on this topic.
You can commit to the 14 activities for 14 days in a row or stretch out the 14 activities for 1 whole month (if you want to take things slow!).
Read on if you want to learn what the 14 self-esteem activities are.
14 Self-Esteem Activities to boost self-worth
Day 1: Name 3 people whose lives are made easier because of your presence
Day 2: Write 3 achievements you are proud of
Day 3: Write 10 strengths and talents that you have
Day 4: Write 3 compliments which make you feel good
Day 5: Ask a friend or loved one to name 3 strengths that you have
Day 6: Compliment a stranger (a tough one!)
Day 7: Have lunch or tea alone at a nice cafe. Enjoy your own company.
Day 8: Script your ideal life. Choose one goal which you really want to achieve. Grab your journal and write today’s entry as though you have achieved that goal. Write your feelings when you achieved it, the ups and downs you had to go through to achieve the goal. (It’s a fun exercise, promise!)
Day 9: Write your answer to this question: “If I have 100% high self-esteem, what would I be doing today?”
Day 10: Groom yourself. Give yourself a manicure, a pedicure, body scrub in the shower, shave, body cream- the whole shebang. Wear nice, clean clothes and spritz your favourite perfume.
Day 11: Make no plans today and trust your intuition to guide you on what to do today. (do things and go to places on a whim if you feel like it)
Day 12: Visualise achieving one goal that you want. Close your eyes and visualise in great, realistic detail. Just do this for 5 minutes. (if you can, visualise for at least 5 minutes everyday)
Day 13: Write 5 small achievements you’ve had today in your journal
Day 14: Think of 1 future goal which you want to achieve very much. Write “I know I can achieve ___(insert goal)___ because…” in your journal
For your convenience, you can download and print a copy of these 14 self-esteem activities below:
If you want to double up your self esteem, you can look at my 21 journal prompts to build self-esteem instantly.
I hope the above 14 self-esteem activities will be helpful for you.
Meanwhile, have a good week!
Shikah
Related self-esteem blog articles
(Free Printable) How to be Intentional and Feel Calm if you are very busy
I’m sharing 5 habits so you can practice intentional living even if you are very busy. Intentional living takes effort. To make it easier for you to practise intentional living everyday, you can adopt these 5 habits as soon as possible. You can feel relaxed and calm even if you have a busy lifestyle!
How to practice intentional living with these 5 habits even if you are very busy.
I love being intentional everyday. I make better choices, I am calmer and I am happier with my life in general.
But when we are busy, being intentional takes too much mental energy.
I am sharing 5 habits to help you practise intentional living as much as possible. Even if you are busy as heck.
If you are new-ish to intentional living, you can get a clearer idea with this Intro to Intentional Living blog post from SimplyFiercely.com.
If you like a more hands-on approach, you can check out my Top 7 intentional living worksheets you can download for free!
Let’s start learning the 5 habits of intentional living for busy babes like you.
Habit #1: Start with a clear mind in the mornings
This is so important.
“Yeah Shikah, but how do I keep a clear mind in the morning?” you ask.
Step 1: Ensure you have at least 7 hours of sleep at night.
Sorry, this sounds boring, I know. But when your mind is well-rested, your day becomes almost magical.
You are in a good mood, you take on work challenges like a pro and you even eat better food.
Step 2: Wake up 30 minutes earlier. And do any activity which calms your mind.
Some examples are:
Meditation (Jason Stephenson’s guided meditations on YouTube are good)
Listening to binaural beats on Spotify
Yoga (Yoga with Adrienne on YouTube is a good start)
Journaling
Going for a run
Sipping on a cup of coffee slowly and mindfully (with no gadgets around)
A clear mind is what stands in between having a mouth-watering, wholesome meal in the morning and grabbing a sugar-laden frappuccino for breakfast.
If you need 25 small ways to start intentional living, you can download my printable below:
Habit #2: Shake up your routine everyday
Some ideas are:
Try a new style of outfit. Wear a colour you’ve never worn before. (Pore over ‘best-dressed celebs’ lists for some ideas)
Try a new makeup technique. (Go to YouTube for inspiration!)
Run along a different route or take a different route to work.
Get coffee from a coffee place you’ve never tried before.
Have a meal at a cafe you’ve never been to before.
Listen to a genre of music you’ve never tried.
I think you get the drift.
If you are quite new to intentional living, you can get advice on 5 intentional habits for beginners in this blog post.
Habit #3: Journal 15 minutes before sleeping
I will admit that I am bad with this habit.
On some nights, it takes too much effort to reflect on my day (I just want to sleep!).
But…on the days that I journal before sleeping, I feel so good and in control of my life.
If you need ideas on how to start journaling a little a day, you can download my daily intentional planner below.
Habit #4: Do a tech detox 60 minutes before bedtime
I know many of us will struggle with this. But it’s life-changing, girls.
The first time I did a 60-minute tech detox at 930pm (I sleep around 1030pm each night), I was struggling to find things to do!
I will list down what you can do for 60 minutes without your phone or laptop:
Take a long, elaborate shower. With essential oils, scrubs, body masks and all.
Journal!
Read something. A newspaper, a book, a magazine, an Ikea catalogue (no joke).
Talk to your partner in person
Go exercise! Yoga or some stretching.
Visualisation. I have read that visualising for 10 minutes a day can manifest what you desire faster.
Lie down in bed and rest
Before you realise it, 60 minutes is up. This is when you tuck your phone away and go to bed.
(Warning: Don’t give in to the temptation to quickly scroll through your emails or messages! Leave that for tomorrow morning)
Habit #5: Plan every single day!
This habit sounds really obvious isn’t it?
But sometimes, days have gone by without me planning anything.
No elaborate planning is needed: just list 3 things you want to accomplish the following day.
I will advise you to plan your days the night before, not on the day itself.
Once we’ve listed the 3 priorities to accomplish the following day, we will sleep better.
And wake up all geared-up with a sense of purpose.
My last thoughts on intentional living if you are busy
Intentional living needs some effort.
In this blog post, I share 5 intentional living advice for beginners to help you kick start your intentional living journey.
If you want to take action immediately, you can download 25 simple ideas for intentional living which you can start today.
I believe that if we practise the 5 habits I shared in this blog post, we can be intentional on most days!
Share with me below: What are your challenges with intentional living?
Shikah
Free Printable Daily Planner to Help You Get Organized and Be Intentional
I created this free printable daily planner to help you get organized, achieve your daily goals and be more intentional everyday! Being intentional is not easy - it needs prompting! In this planner, take note of things which make you happy everyday. And plan how to make tomorrow even better than today. Print it out or type directly on it!
A free printable daily planner to help you get organized and be more intentional. Print it out or type directly on it!
It is exhausting to be intentional for every decision everyday.
Sometimes we need prompting.
That is why I created this free printable daily planner - to help us get organized and be more intentional. And make it easier for us to do so.
Focus on what went right today. And how we can make tomorrow even better.
I wanted a printable daily planner which is simple and useful and makes me feel good.
Oh, and it has to be easy for us women on the go. So I created this for you to either
print 7 copies every Sunday in A4 size and staple them
or type directly on the planner and save it!
So how do we use this daily planner? Let’s start!
List Only 3 Goals for the Day
Keep our goals at 3 every day. Any more than that and we will feel overwhelmed!
Keep the goals intentional. Make sure these goals are something you TRULY want to achieve today.
Write the small things which made you feel good today
Write ANYTHING which made you feel good today. Genuinely good.
Maybe you saw a stylish lady on the street who made you feel inspired about dressing up.
Maybe you saw a handsome stranger who looked like Liam Hemsworth on the train and you felt dreamy.
Maybe you were at a boutique which had killer views and you felt at peace being there (me at an Apple studio a few days ago).
Seek out the things which make you happy every day.
This makes every day feel special.
And trains us to have a positive and intentional mindset.
It can be as simple as feeling the sun on your face as you walk through a park.
Write as many as you can.
Think how you can make tomorrow better than today
Keep this list to 3 activities so they seem achievable!
My list for this will usually include a couple of these:
Sleep for 9 hours
Do a tech detox 60 minutes before bedtime
Watch a rom-com or funny sitcom
Try a new eyeshadow technique
Every day is different. So your list for today will look different from yesterday’s.
My last thoughts on this printable daily planner:
This daily planner looks simple.
But if we intentionally write in it every day, we will have a positive mindset.
That’s how powerful habits can be.
Print 7 copies of this daily planner in A4 size every Sunday and staple them to keep life simple.
Or just type directly on the document and save it!
Type your email address below and I’ll send it to your inbox.
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